Open your Heart to Me

[Hardlight]

"How about right here?" Kevin said as the pair had walked out of the Rec-Room together. "It's not the Ritz, but I'm no bigshot, just a down to earth kinda guy. You don't mind if we just sit here on the staris and talk do you?" He didn't want to insult her but he wanted to be able to just talk and not worry about going somwhere special. He walked her up a few stairs and he waited for her to sit on a step and then he sat on the next step down from her.

"I'm sorry to drag you away from everybody and thanks so much for coming, you know I'm kinda needing to get somthing out and I don't know who to talk to." He looked at his hands as he absently minded played with his fingernails. "You're one of my best friends and I just- well," he hesatited because he wasn't sure just how to start talking about what was bugging him "I'm really kinda sad." He looked up from his fingers to the beautiful pools of inocent tranquiltity that where Allures eye's.

[Allure]

Veronika had looked at the stairs with disdain, thinking of how many people walked all over it with their dirty cheap shoes. It wasn't her ideal choice in the least bit, but conceded only because she would dare not turn Kevin away in his current state. Now was the time she lived up to her role as the sweet understanding friend. She sat down after dusting it off a little bit and looked at Kevin's sweet face that she was sure would be much more refined when he got older.

"Oh darling, I am so sorry you are sad. It is about the team switch with Katana and Frostbite yes?" Veronika said with concern laced into her sweet Russian accent. She placed her small and dainty hand on his shoulder to give him a comforting touch. It was her role that she played well and of course, she always made time for someone in her inner circle.

"You can talk to me Kevin, as usual anything you tell me stays between us," Veronika said in a warm voice to him. She would listen to and give him the comfort, knowing it would only strengthen their friendship and she'd end up keeping his loyalty.

[Hardlight]

"OK sure, but yeah, how did you-? Well I guess it's the most obvlious thing, right? So of course you'd guess it." Kevin looked a little sheepitch about being so obvious, but it was more than just the switch. "I mean it bothers me and all, that's for sure. You know you guys are getting a great person and are like totally making out like bandits."

"But there's more than just this simple little switch. It's deeper for me." He put his hands together with his fingers exended, like in prayers, and placed them -tapping them several times- up to his lips, his finger tips right under his nose while he tried to collect his thoughts on the matter. "I have known her for a long time. I almost died with her in Limbo, and she saved me and I saved her- and even though I know you're not real fond of her Aidene was there too with us. She saved us mostly all on her own, Lorelai knows that and what happened earlier is hurting me still."

"I mean there I was playing doubles with Frostbite- tennis, right?- and then all of asudden she is running over to help out that guy from the Hellions, you know him, the one whos always bothering Ember. I was like 'HUH?' and I just have been thinking about a lot of stuff." He put his head back and leaned back against the deep mahogunny wood spindels of the railing and said "Like that maybe I could have been a better friend, because she needed me and I wasn't there sometimes cause I was with Diesel. Or that maybe I was too needy and spent too much time with her and didn't give her space to sort out how she felt about Ian. I laughed sometimes at team practices when Haven and him would make a joke at her expence, but I didn't mean to make her want to leave."

He looked back up at Allure, his eyes were starting to fill with tears and his little lip quivered some when he said "I wasn't good enough for her and now my best friend is gone *snif* and I don't think things will- *sniff*- be the same for me ever here. I'm just so - *sniffle* - so sad, and " he took out his hankerchief and wiped his nose from the runnyness and tried hard to fight gravity pulling on his tears.

"And we always hung out at this time, I would only usually stay for one episode and sometimes not even a whole one before I would go off to spend time with her and now she just left with those older kids. I watched her go. She was feeling like somebody special or like she was trying to be somebody she's not- Trying to be bad, but that's not her, and I'm maybe a little mad at her for not being strong enough to be herself."

He wiped his nose again and fought back on the tears, because they never help anyway, and besides that his sadness was turning to anger at the thought of what she was trying to do. "Who is she kidding anyway? I think she's being a jerk if you ask me, cause I was a friend, her only friend when all that stuff went down with her and Ian. Nobody else would listen to her cry for hours every night and every night for weeks at a time. I was a good friend, and I still am, but this isn't right. She owes me an explanation at least. I'm realy confused cause she broke up with him and now she's like breaking up with her team, like breaking up with me too, her best friend- since she just ditched me at gym- and hasn't said a word since."

"So what if Haven's a bitch, we all know she is sometimes, and so what if Ian is all over her- he used to be all over Frostbite but nobody said anything about that then. It was her choice to break up with him, her choice to leave me at gymclass, her choice to quit the team and her choice to go out tonight with those Hellion kids." He looked up at Veronika again. The look on his face one of complete confusion and exapseration.

He shook his head a little bit and frowned in defeat as he placed his forehead on her knee and mumbled "I'm sorry, I'm just kinda messed up about this. Can you help me? I didn't have any friends back home, nobody thought too much of me there. So I don't know what to do, or how to feel about all of this stuff. Am I totally wrong? Or beeing way to sensitive or something?"

[Allure]

Veronika listened to Kevin talk calmly and quietly, attentively at every word. She did not like it when someone in her inner circle was unfocused and troubled. Oh the poor thing, frankly I thought the whole thing earlier was hilarious. The style challenged blue haired girl actually earned more points in my book. If it wouldn't ruin my act, I would give Rumble a hefty reward for torturing that harlot and almost killing the albino slut and sadly Ian as well, but sacrifices need to be done for the greater good. I suppose that it is understandable that he feels saddened. "Oh Kevin, come darling," she said and put her arms around him, hugging him comfortingly.

She stroked his hair comfortingly, the way a mother would a small child or how one would comfort their scared puppy. "Darling, do not think that you are not good enough for her, you know that is not true. You are a dear, dear friend to all," Veronika said soothingly. "People all change darling, and I can only imagine it was hard for Lorelai to see her ex with someone else, and as I understand, nothing was ever settled between them. Things like that... well they do change people yes, and sometimes people hold it in and then it all comes out when something happens to set it off. That seems to be the case here darling. For all you know that may be how she was the entire time, she just bottled it in and then today it came out. It is not something unusual darling, and it happens to many people," she explained best as she could to give him that bit of comfort.

Veronika kept her arms around him and moved so he could rest his head on her shoulder. "It is apart of growing up darling, and Lorelai must find herself and learn who she really is on her own. It is something we all do. Just like you changed the past couple of months, and many other people have as well. She made all the choices, and she will continue to make them. Some you may not like, but if she is smart, which I hope to God since she is now on my team, she will keep you with her through all those choices," she comforted and kissed his forehead sweetly and comfortingly.

[Hardlight]

"Yeah, well she never said anything to me about wanting to change. I thought things would be ok an dthat stuff would settle back into some kind of normal rythm and that we would still keep being the tight group we were, I don't like this at all. Why does it have to be like this Veronika? Why can't it be the way I want it to be? How come I always have to be the one who has to just deal with it?" he said softly and sadly as Allure stroked his hair and tried to sooth him.

"When are things going to get better for me? Back to normal? How come this hurts so bad? I feel like a big piece of me just got ripped out of my chest, I'm so sad- she was like my whole world and I feel like I'm alone again." he sat for a second and took a deep breath. "Not really, but you know for being all upset and all, I'm just like blowing stuff all outta pruportion and all. I know she'll still be my friend and I know I have you, and Ian and my other friends- and my team is still my team, and she only went out for one night, and she didn't cry all the time, only a little- I swear though it feels so messed up and exagerated in my heart, like tomorrow is gonna suck and every tomorrow after that too. What do I do now? How do I keep going without my winggirl? She helped me through stuff all the time and I helped her and now we are in like two different tribes and this suuucks! I just want it to go back the way it was. Keep the good stuff and lose the bad."

He knew though that things never went back the way they were. He knew that lesson from long ago when he told his parents he was gay. They never went back to loving him the way they did before he had said it. He couldn't un-say it, they couldn't un-hear it. Things just kept falling forward into eternity, like time and gravity both pulled you down, and eventually you found yourself in the ground anyway so what did it all matter anyway? His heart was so very heavy and he just sat shaking his head and looking down at the steps below them. His life had been too hard for him, but he had kept going with his head held high because he didn't know what else to do, now he was really lost and alone without her. He would just have to do what he could and face his future counting more on himself from now on. "Yeah, it's tough to have to grow up, learn to axcept changes and all, I hope this makes her happy. If it does then it's worth me being sad. I love her and she deserves some happy in her life. I guess I can deal with it if I try and think more of her heart than my own."

He placed his hands together, left hand under his right and a light shot out between his fingers and then pulling his right hand away from covering up what he had made he revealed a beautiful sculpt that he would keep on his night table to remind him of how special his friend's heart was to him and how fragile too, like anybodys heart could be, like his own was.

[Allure]

Veronika smiled at the little heart that Kevin made. He was truly one of the most talented people she had ever come across, and she felt he would be quite useful to her in the future. "Do not be sad Kevin, there is a silver lining in every sad moment. I know you are hurting by all this, but it will be alright," she said with a more sincere smile, practicing the art of being a compassionate woman, as she often saw her own mother be to others even when she had no true ounce of compassion within her. Veronika's mother was a companion to her father's vast business, and she taught Veronika everything about how to succeed in a man's world, making her an amazing actress that was without comparison.

This was not a case of her faking all her sympathy, she did hate to see a valued member of her inner circle in distress. Veronika offered him a smile and stood up grabbing his hand and pulling him to standing. "Come now, no more tears darling all will be well. I know just what you need!" she said and walked with him hand in hand to the direction of her dorms. Veronika was not worried about getting in trouble because it would be simply foolish to assume anything inappropriate since it was Kevin in her room.

"I found that book I was telling you about from the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Oh you will simply love some of the art in there. We must go next time I visit my home. It will be a wonderful trip..." Veronika trailed off and continued engaging Kevin in conversation of his favorite topics as they made their way to Veronika's dorm room.